Growing up in rural Elliotdale, Nasizo Mndende became used to being mocked for her dark complexion and appearance.
As a child in Ntlonyane village, she was called Umbishe — “the ugly one” — by people around her.
At the same time she watched some of the young girls she grew up with become mothers while still at school, with many later struggling with substance abuse and broken dreams.
Now 31, Mndende has turned those experiences into a message of resilience and self-worth through her nonprofit organisation Inkciyo South Africa and a self-published book detailing her life story and advocacy work.
Mndende, who works as a social worker in Mthatha, is among the nominees in the Daily Dispatch Local Heroes initiative, which recognises people who are making a meaningful impact in their communities.
Her book, Audacious Virgin, was launched in April and explores themes of bullying, identity, family values and social pressure, drawing heavily on her upbringing in rural Eastern Cape communities.
The book is distributed through KSD Books Distribution Networks.
“I grew up in church where we were taught that our bodies are God’s temple, but I also saw many children I grew up with facing difficult situations at a young age,” she said.
“As I grew up, I became proud of the decisions I made for myself.
“This book is really about accepting who I am so that I can help other people heal.
“I had to remain true to myself and be unapologetically brave to overcome the boundaries that were placed before me.”
Mndende said the book was written to encourage young people, particularly those from rural communities, and not to allow circumstances or criticism to define them.
“It is a book that anyone can read and relate to, including men, women and young people from rural areas,” she said.
“I touch on my background and how I never allowed it to shape my future.
“I and my cousins once dreamed of appearing on Generations. People laughed at us, but one of my cousins later appeared on Scandal.
“We never allowed people to make us believe our dreams were too big for us.”
Mndende said she began speaking publicly about abstinence and youth empowerment on social media several years ago, but quickly became the target of ridicule and cyberbullying.
Some social media users mocked her appearance and claimed she had chosen chastity because “boys would not want her”.
She admitted the comments deeply affected her confidence at times, but said they ultimately strengthened her resolve to continue helping young people.
“I want people, when they remember my name, to think of someone who is very strong,” she said.
“I faced many obstacles that could have taken my life in a different direction, but I chose to remain true to my values and my own path.”
She said publishing the book had also required overcoming significant self-doubt.
“The book had actually been completed before 2024, but it took me a long time to publish it because fear kicked in and I worried about how people would respond,” she said.
Mndende believes many of the social challenges affecting young people require more open conversations between adults and children, particularly around relationships, consent and self-worth.
“The only explanation if a 10-year-old gets pregnant is that they were raped,” she said.
“If there was enough empowerment out there, children would be warned about dangerous situations and manipulation by older people.”
She said parents also needed to create supportive home environments for children.
“The world can be a cruel place and if your child does not feel loved at home, they will often look for it elsewhere, sometimes with devastating consequences,” she said.
Through Inkciyo South Africa, Mndende hosts camps and round-table discussions aimed at equipping young people with life skills and guidance around education, health and decision-making.
She said the organisation’s work focused on helping young people build confidence and avoid destructive behaviour patterns.
Despite the criticism she once faced online, Mndende said support for her work had steadily grown over time.
“Nowadays I do not even have to defend myself,” she said.
“By the time I get to social media, the people who spread hate have already been answered by those who support what I do.”
Mndende’s manager, Anathi Kanzi, who nominated her for the Local Heroes initiative, said her impact extended far beyond her personal achievements.
“She is building something for other people and that is the mark of a local hero,” Kanzi said.
Mndende had managed to balance postgraduate studies, writing a book and community work while remaining committed to uplifting young people in rural communities, Kanzi added.
“She inspires young people to pursue education and purpose without losing sight of their values,” she said.
Daily Dispatch
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